The Campaign Dilemma, Yoga Born Sessions, Hybrid Spirits Bike Group

Good morning, South Windsor! Today is July 21, 2012; there are 162 days left in the year.

Hey gang, it’s election season and there is a serious issue on which I think you all need to find out the position of the candidates before you make a choice come November. Without question, this issue is one that has far-reaching consequences involving, among other things, the economy and immigration, not to mention where a candidate’s moral compass leads.

Before you pull the lever (or, in this day and age, scan your ballot), you need to find out where your candidate stands on bacon.

More specifically, do they eat regular bacon, or do they outsource their pork products to a foreign competitor in the form of Canadian bacon? Look, there’s no question that Canadian bacon is awesome, but in these economic times, we need to be looking at good ol’ fashioned American, red-white-and-blue bacon. And none of that hippie turkey bacon crap, either. I’m talkin’ straight-from-the-pig, U.S. bacon.

These Canadian pigs, they come across our borders, they take our American pigs’ jobs and they think they’re all delicious. Well, they are. But still, there ain’t nuthin’ wrong with the American pigs, either. Outside of the fact that they’re pigs, that is. But they are equally delicious and I want my elected officials to protect our borders. And our sties.

If you aren’t with me, then you are against me.

Here’s your Daily 5:

1. Yoga Born is having free open sessions starting at 11:30 a.m. The event is also serving as a fundraiser for Andrew Haraghey, a 16-year-old would-be Paralympian skier.

2. Join the Hybrid Spirits Bike Group this morning at 8:30 a.m.

3.  Visit the GlastonburyGrown.com’s Farmers’ Market. Awesome.

4. Bruce Gregori performs tonight at 7 p.m.

5. Shabbat and Worship Services at Temple Beth Hillel.